The scenario
I was chatting to a girl in the office a few days ago....
She does internet dating and was explaining to her friends how it all works.
The conversation got onto a ‘hot prospect’ that she was supposedly going to meet up with but how she’d decided to ‘bail out’ as she had some doubts and didn’t have the same feelings for the guy.
My eyes lit up as I grasped the relevance of this and how it would be useful to share with our email subscribers.....so here goes:
Apparently they’d been emailing for a while which had progressed to instant messaging on MSN and a few phone calls and text messages.
He was a music producer.
Wow! Cool job!
So I asked her why she wasn’t going to see him. Her answer went like this:
“I just don’t feel the same for him. Perhaps I’m too fussy. At first I really liked him and thought it would be great to meet as we seemed so alike. I was really optimistic.”
I asked her what changed....
“Well he just became a bit too ‘full on.’ He’d text me every morning with a “Hi gorgeous” message. And he’d text me all the time.”
She then went on to say:
“So I told him I didn’t want to meet up. I wanted to cool it for a while. He said he’d fallen for me, big time and really thought we had a future together.”
When a woman says she wants to ‘cool it for a while’ you’re history!!
History
And this guy is history. He didn’t even get a first date.
My friend thinks she’s too fussy.
Guess what?
The guy screwed up!
MASSIVELY!
Never, never, never reveal your true feelings for a woman at such an early stage.
It’s 100% guaranteed to KILL the attraction she feels for you.
There are numerous reasons and detail behind the why and I’m going to touch on 3:
Fact 1:
Too soon.
First off it’s too early.
You may see someone and engage in conversation and think to yourself “Wow this girl is amazing I think I could marry her!”
She may also be thinking something like “I like this guy, he’s fun, cute and sexy. I hope this goes somewhere.”
But the moment you come on so strong you’re killing the mystery, the intrigue, the differentiator and other thing that make you attractive. In fact you’ve become a lame, boring, dull and typical guy!
So chill out!
Take your time. Act aloof.
Fact 2:
In this case my friend has been living by herself for 3 years.
Living by yourself has some advantages. You can be a ‘free spirit’. You can choose what you want to do and when you want to do it. You can live like a slob or live in a ‘showhome!’ The point is the choice is yours.
The moment you come on strong, her subconscious is going to start ringing alarm bells, saying “Change! Change! Change!”
People don’t like change. So avoid this but not breaking the status quo.
Fact 3:
She got to miss you.
Guys that text every hour of the day, come across as needy, desperate and generally a proper wet rag!
I doubt you’re any of those, but that is how it appears.
Would a really hot guy who had the pick of numerous women really text every hour?
No, he’d be hard to get hold of, difficult to pin down and the women would be chasing him.
So don’t text every hour and never write ‘needy’ messages.
If you write “Hi gorgeous” then you owe me a case of beer!!
Instead write:
“Hey I know you’re missing me like crazy, so I wanted to give you a little taster of me! Have fun! X”
A text like that say’s you’re confident about yourself. You’re not needy. You’re not trying to change her life and move in with her. It also sub-consciously makes her feel you’re different, calm, confident and slightly aloof.
This is a tiny fraction of what we coach in The SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™.
If you want to perfect the ART of ATTRACTING women.
Want to know the SECRETS on how to attract women? Sign up to the FREE coaching email, full of dating tips for men and get a FREE guide on Why Most Dates Fail.
Good luck out there.
Callum
Showing posts with label uk dating advice for men. Show all posts
Showing posts with label uk dating advice for men. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Hot women and Saturday nights
Hot women and Saturday nights.
Will it be another wasted Saturday night out with the boys?
I have a single friend (for the sake of this email we’ll call him Russell) he’s 36 and a self employed Accountant. He brings in a fairly large income and works very hard. It takes quite a lot of encouraging to get him to come out for a few beers – he’s always using excuses like:
“I’m too tired!”
“I’ve got a lot of work on.”
“I’ve got to meet a big client tomorrow.”
After a couple of drinks on Friday he finally admitted why he was reluctant to come out.
Russell’s story – He said the reason he was so reluctant to come out on a weekend was the frustrations he feels when he gets home, usually without even a single phone number. He feels very confident talking through the details of someone else’s business and challenges, but when it comes to approaching women in a bar he becomes a wreck! So when he wakes up in the morning following a night out he doesn’t feel relaxed after being out with some friends, he said he feels really frustrated.
Now I don’t think Russell is alone in this situation – how many of us in the last few weeks walked home with a takeaway for one, or back to a friends for a for more drinks?
What should you do?
Personally I don’t think focusing all of your efforts on finding true love should be done in your local bars and clubs, if you enjoy going to those places then it’s different. Otherwise they will only enhance your frustrations; you’ll also look like a fish out of water. You have to ask yourself – does the girl of my dreams hang around in Yates’?
SO where do you go?
Internet dating has become an easier and more efficient place to meet like minded people, but again it should be used as part of your dating strategy, you also have to bear in mind the fact that you’ll also have to make a good impression when you meet your internet date. That means you need practise getting your approaches and openers spot on.
Fit to date?
This doesn’t mean a six pack and bulging ‘guns’ – fit to date means you can have a great conversation, really make a great first impression and not appear like everyone else. For this you need practice and some professional coaching.
Practice is easy – you can walk into any public place and start talking to someone.
Coaching is also easy – book onto our 7 part course – It will cost you half as much as your last night out. But unlike your last night out, if it doesn’t improve your success rate we’ll give you your money back!
So ask yourself – do I want to keep walking home really frustrated after a fruitless night out? Or do I want the confidence to speak with attractive women?
If the answer is the latter then BOOK NOW!
It’s all here in The SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™
Best wishes
Callum
Will it be another wasted Saturday night out with the boys?
I have a single friend (for the sake of this email we’ll call him Russell) he’s 36 and a self employed Accountant. He brings in a fairly large income and works very hard. It takes quite a lot of encouraging to get him to come out for a few beers – he’s always using excuses like:
“I’m too tired!”
“I’ve got a lot of work on.”
“I’ve got to meet a big client tomorrow.”
After a couple of drinks on Friday he finally admitted why he was reluctant to come out.
Russell’s story – He said the reason he was so reluctant to come out on a weekend was the frustrations he feels when he gets home, usually without even a single phone number. He feels very confident talking through the details of someone else’s business and challenges, but when it comes to approaching women in a bar he becomes a wreck! So when he wakes up in the morning following a night out he doesn’t feel relaxed after being out with some friends, he said he feels really frustrated.
Now I don’t think Russell is alone in this situation – how many of us in the last few weeks walked home with a takeaway for one, or back to a friends for a for more drinks?
What should you do?
Personally I don’t think focusing all of your efforts on finding true love should be done in your local bars and clubs, if you enjoy going to those places then it’s different. Otherwise they will only enhance your frustrations; you’ll also look like a fish out of water. You have to ask yourself – does the girl of my dreams hang around in Yates’?
SO where do you go?
Internet dating has become an easier and more efficient place to meet like minded people, but again it should be used as part of your dating strategy, you also have to bear in mind the fact that you’ll also have to make a good impression when you meet your internet date. That means you need practise getting your approaches and openers spot on.
Fit to date?
This doesn’t mean a six pack and bulging ‘guns’ – fit to date means you can have a great conversation, really make a great first impression and not appear like everyone else. For this you need practice and some professional coaching.
Practice is easy – you can walk into any public place and start talking to someone.
Coaching is also easy – book onto our 7 part course – It will cost you half as much as your last night out. But unlike your last night out, if it doesn’t improve your success rate we’ll give you your money back!
So ask yourself – do I want to keep walking home really frustrated after a fruitless night out? Or do I want the confidence to speak with attractive women?
If the answer is the latter then BOOK NOW!
It’s all here in The SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™
Best wishes
Callum
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Why are women so complex
Summer ball
On Friday I had the pleasure of attending the Wootton Bassett Rugby Club Summer Ball.
It was a great event.
A huge marquee was erected in the rugby field with tastefully decorated tunnels adjoining the clubhouse. The whole interior was given an oriental theme complete with a waterfall and dry ice machine.
The food was excellent and the price included drinks, so it was a great opportunity to eat and drink as much as you wanted to before working off those calories on the dance floor!
There was somewhere in the region of 400 people there. The women wore glamourous dresses whilst us guys had to wear the customers DJ’s.
A band kicked off after the food had been served and played through until 3am.
My lady for the ball
I had the pleasure of being invited by Chloe (a made up name as she’d never forgive me if she knew I’d written this!)
Now Chloe is about 5’5”. She has long brunette hair, dark eyes and is a size 8 pushing size 6. She is fanatical about her fitness and body and to say she’s toned is a massive understatement.
She’s simply gorgeous!
Paradox
Before we got to the event Chloe described her friend Stephanie and partner who we were meeting at the venue. She described Stephanie as being simply stunning. A 10 out of 10 in every department. She even stated that she wished she was as beautiful, as glamourous and as young looking as Stephanie.
The whole drive there I was wondering what the ‘gorgeous Stephanie’ was going to look like??
Of course I was surprised to meet Stephanie.
She was pretty. Coming in at about 5’6”, with a size 8 figure and blonde bobbed hair. She wore a red dress that I have to admit was the right colour for her and she did look beautiful.
But.
And it’s a big BUT.
She wasn’t a patch on Chloe.
Chloe was prettier. She had a better face shape. Nicer eyes. Better teeth and much fuller lips.
Chloe also looked years younger even though they are both the same age.
And too cap it all Chloe also had a better figure!
In fact of the 200+ women that were at the event I can honestly say that Chloe was in the top 3.
Yet she doesn’t believe that.
She thinks she’s overweight, old and not as pretty or as glamourus as the other women!
This is an interesting paradox that affects more women than not.
They are all mostly paranoid about their looks.
If you don’t believe me…….think about it………how many women have you ever known that say “I want to put a bit of weight on. Fill out a bit. I could do with putting on a few pounds.”
Yep exactly.
NONE!!
Every woman I’ve ever known has been on some kind of diet. They’ve all said they’d like to lose a few pounds. Get down a dress size!
Yet they all look stunning and all have the kind of figure that every man would be happy to explore.
Why
One of the reasons women are like this is because they are born with these characteristics.
They literally have an inbuilt system that says:
“Must look prettier.”
“Must lose more weight.”
And this inbuilt system also makes them incredibly competitive.
Women love to compete with each other. Hence, why they take so long to get themselves ready for a big night like a ball. They want to look stunning and want to feel like they’re better than every other woman in there!
Fact 1
Now when men look at STUNNING women they often think things like:
“Wow she’s hot. I’d love to date her!”
“Oh my god she is gorgeous. She’s way out of my league!”
“I bet her boyfriend is rich and incredibly good looking.”
But in fact the opposite is often true.
They are never ‘Out of your league’ and if you say that STOP right now.
The point here is that many of the best looking women often think they are the least pretty ones and that’s why they take even more care and trouble over their appearance.
What to do next
You simply download the SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™ and read the theory, do the exercises and go and engage in conversation with these STUNNING women.
SIMPLE.
EASY.
And it WORKS!
Enjoy the summer ball!
Callum
On Friday I had the pleasure of attending the Wootton Bassett Rugby Club Summer Ball.
It was a great event.
A huge marquee was erected in the rugby field with tastefully decorated tunnels adjoining the clubhouse. The whole interior was given an oriental theme complete with a waterfall and dry ice machine.
The food was excellent and the price included drinks, so it was a great opportunity to eat and drink as much as you wanted to before working off those calories on the dance floor!
There was somewhere in the region of 400 people there. The women wore glamourous dresses whilst us guys had to wear the customers DJ’s.
A band kicked off after the food had been served and played through until 3am.
My lady for the ball
I had the pleasure of being invited by Chloe (a made up name as she’d never forgive me if she knew I’d written this!)
Now Chloe is about 5’5”. She has long brunette hair, dark eyes and is a size 8 pushing size 6. She is fanatical about her fitness and body and to say she’s toned is a massive understatement.
She’s simply gorgeous!
Paradox
Before we got to the event Chloe described her friend Stephanie and partner who we were meeting at the venue. She described Stephanie as being simply stunning. A 10 out of 10 in every department. She even stated that she wished she was as beautiful, as glamourous and as young looking as Stephanie.
The whole drive there I was wondering what the ‘gorgeous Stephanie’ was going to look like??
Of course I was surprised to meet Stephanie.
She was pretty. Coming in at about 5’6”, with a size 8 figure and blonde bobbed hair. She wore a red dress that I have to admit was the right colour for her and she did look beautiful.
But.
And it’s a big BUT.
She wasn’t a patch on Chloe.
Chloe was prettier. She had a better face shape. Nicer eyes. Better teeth and much fuller lips.
Chloe also looked years younger even though they are both the same age.
And too cap it all Chloe also had a better figure!
In fact of the 200+ women that were at the event I can honestly say that Chloe was in the top 3.
Yet she doesn’t believe that.
She thinks she’s overweight, old and not as pretty or as glamourus as the other women!
This is an interesting paradox that affects more women than not.
They are all mostly paranoid about their looks.
If you don’t believe me…….think about it………how many women have you ever known that say “I want to put a bit of weight on. Fill out a bit. I could do with putting on a few pounds.”
Yep exactly.
NONE!!
Every woman I’ve ever known has been on some kind of diet. They’ve all said they’d like to lose a few pounds. Get down a dress size!
Yet they all look stunning and all have the kind of figure that every man would be happy to explore.
Why
One of the reasons women are like this is because they are born with these characteristics.
They literally have an inbuilt system that says:
“Must look prettier.”
“Must lose more weight.”
And this inbuilt system also makes them incredibly competitive.
Women love to compete with each other. Hence, why they take so long to get themselves ready for a big night like a ball. They want to look stunning and want to feel like they’re better than every other woman in there!
Fact 1
Now when men look at STUNNING women they often think things like:
“Wow she’s hot. I’d love to date her!”
“Oh my god she is gorgeous. She’s way out of my league!”
“I bet her boyfriend is rich and incredibly good looking.”
But in fact the opposite is often true.
They are never ‘Out of your league’ and if you say that STOP right now.
The point here is that many of the best looking women often think they are the least pretty ones and that’s why they take even more care and trouble over their appearance.
What to do next
You simply download the SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™ and read the theory, do the exercises and go and engage in conversation with these STUNNING women.
SIMPLE.
EASY.
And it WORKS!
Enjoy the summer ball!
Callum
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Why are some guys successful with women?
Experience
Let me share with you a real life experience.
Some years ago I used to play football on a Saturday for a local team in a league in Gloucestershire.
The plan was, after the game to go for a few drinks and then all meet up later in Cheltenham to go on to a nightclub.
One of the players was a guy called Gary. He was a short-arse at about 5’5” and had a completely bald head. Years with a receding hairline he’d simply decided to shave what little he had left. Gary was in the Royal Air Force and was a tough tackling midfielder.
Eye opener
It was an eye opening experience.
As a bunch of guys we did the usual thing of checking out the club upon arrival and then making a bee line for the bar.
Drink in hand we then moved around the club with a view to finding some potential ladies to strike up a conversation with.
I remember one round table having a group of 4 or 5 women all of which were stunners. None of them paid any attention to our group.
Within about a nanosecond of spotting the group Gary simply marched over to the table, sat amongst them and within seconds had engaged them in conversation. After about 3 minutes you could see them all laughing and smiling and all vying for Gary’s attention.
It was remarkable.
How had this guy, who on a scale of ‘best looking’ guys would hardly register, managed to get a bunch of gorgeous women literally begging for his attention?
7 days later
The following week we were playing at home and at the end of the match Gary’s girlfriend turned up to drive him home so he could have a few drinks in the clubhouse.
His girlfriend was simply divine. A 10 out of 10 and could have easily been a model!
The other 9 players, myself, the manager and the subs simply stared agog.
Wow!
A few years later
This was a few years ago.......and how things have changed.
I haven’t seen Gary in the time but I do know how he managed to attract such gorgeous women.
And the good news is, it’s so easy!
You don’t have to be tall. You don’t have to have dark hair. You don’t have to be a millionaire and you certainly don’t have to be good looking.
Gary had the special MAGIC that made him attractive. He had that certain something. Whether he knew he had it or not remains to be seen and I’ll probably never know.
But I know how you can get that special MAGIC.
I know how you can chat to any girl or group of girls and make them feel a powerful attraction to you.
And it doesn’t matter what you look like, what job you have, what car you drive.
It’s all in the SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™
If you want the success that Gary had.
If you want to be able to engage in conversation with a group of stunning women then you need to master the techniques that we coach.
And if you’re unsure then simply download it and if you’re not satisfied you can return it within 14 days for a full refund.
So there’s no risk!
dating tips for men and get a FREE guide on Why Most Dates Fail.
Good luck out there.Callum
Let me share with you a real life experience.
Some years ago I used to play football on a Saturday for a local team in a league in Gloucestershire.
The plan was, after the game to go for a few drinks and then all meet up later in Cheltenham to go on to a nightclub.
One of the players was a guy called Gary. He was a short-arse at about 5’5” and had a completely bald head. Years with a receding hairline he’d simply decided to shave what little he had left. Gary was in the Royal Air Force and was a tough tackling midfielder.
Eye opener
It was an eye opening experience.
As a bunch of guys we did the usual thing of checking out the club upon arrival and then making a bee line for the bar.
Drink in hand we then moved around the club with a view to finding some potential ladies to strike up a conversation with.
I remember one round table having a group of 4 or 5 women all of which were stunners. None of them paid any attention to our group.
Within about a nanosecond of spotting the group Gary simply marched over to the table, sat amongst them and within seconds had engaged them in conversation. After about 3 minutes you could see them all laughing and smiling and all vying for Gary’s attention.
It was remarkable.
How had this guy, who on a scale of ‘best looking’ guys would hardly register, managed to get a bunch of gorgeous women literally begging for his attention?
7 days later
The following week we were playing at home and at the end of the match Gary’s girlfriend turned up to drive him home so he could have a few drinks in the clubhouse.
His girlfriend was simply divine. A 10 out of 10 and could have easily been a model!
The other 9 players, myself, the manager and the subs simply stared agog.
Wow!
A few years later
This was a few years ago.......and how things have changed.
I haven’t seen Gary in the time but I do know how he managed to attract such gorgeous women.
And the good news is, it’s so easy!
You don’t have to be tall. You don’t have to have dark hair. You don’t have to be a millionaire and you certainly don’t have to be good looking.
Gary had the special MAGIC that made him attractive. He had that certain something. Whether he knew he had it or not remains to be seen and I’ll probably never know.
But I know how you can get that special MAGIC.
I know how you can chat to any girl or group of girls and make them feel a powerful attraction to you.
And it doesn’t matter what you look like, what job you have, what car you drive.
It’s all in the SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™
If you want the success that Gary had.
If you want to be able to engage in conversation with a group of stunning women then you need to master the techniques that we coach.
And if you’re unsure then simply download it and if you’re not satisfied you can return it within 14 days for a full refund.
So there’s no risk!
dating tips for men and get a FREE guide on Why Most Dates Fail.
Good luck out there.Callum
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Dating help
Do you want dating help?
Do you need some tips, advice or help on dating women?
Want to know:
Do you need some tips, advice or help on dating women?
Want to know:
- What to say when you see a girl you fancy
- How to get her phone number
- The methods to engage her in conversation and make her fancy you.
Whatever it is you want help with, Charlie and I are only an email away.
Think of us as your dating friends.
The guys that will help you get the woman of your dreams.
Right now!
So if we can help, simply send an email describing what advice you need and we’ll endeavour to answer.
As long as you don’t mind we’ll share the subject (but not your name, so you’ll remain anonymous) with others so that we can all work together to get the girl of our dreams.
Send an email to: callum@tipsfordating.co.uk and let me know what specific areas of advice you’re looking for.
Example
Here’s a recent example and it’s relevant to all of us:
“Callum. I have recently been on some dates with a girl. We got on reasonably well and have seen each other on a total of three separate occasions. However, whilst I find her company fun I am not particularly attracted to her and am unsure how to let her know this without upsetting her. Your advice would be appreciated.”
George, Newcastle.
Hey George I feel your pain.
You sound like a cool guy who’s sincere and thoughtful. It’s always a difficult thing to let someone know that you don’t want to see them again.
However there is a right way to do it.
Before I tell you though consider a few points:
- The longer you delay telling her, the harder it will be for you and for her.
- Not telling her, won’t make the problem go away.
Sometimes it seems like the best solution is to say nothing and hope she ‘get’s the message.’
Well, eventually she will, but it’s going to be painful for her and leave her with many unanswered questions.
The best policy is to be upfront and say some nice things as well as some honest things.
In my years of sports training we called this the Big Mac approach.
Where the bun of a Big Mac is positive feedback and the burger is constructive feedback.
So start with the bun, then the burger and finish with the bun.
Positive – constructive – positive.
Say to her something like:
“Hey I really enjoy your company. We get on well and seeing you has been terrific fun.”
“I have to be honest though. I’m not quite feeling ‘it’ in this relationship. And I thought it would be best to be honest and upfront with you.”
“You’re a great looking girl though and our dates have been incredible fun.”
This way it’s clear that you’re not getting what you want out of the relationship and that it’s gone the distance.
If she’s unsure what you mean she may ask “Does that mean it’s over?” and the simple answer is “Yes it does.”
Most women will be fine with this approach, especially after only a few dates.
Remember being honest and upfront early is the best policy.
That way you have cleared the air and you’re both free to pursue the lives and relationships that you both want and deserve.
I’m glad we can be of help.
Callum
Monday, March 22, 2010
How to attract women even if you don't look like Brad Pitt
Just because you're good looking is no guarantee to success and you'll probably be amazed to hear that you can attract hot women without looking like Brad Pitt.
I’m going to share with you 2 MASSIVE SECRETS.
The first one I’m going to talk about today and the second one in the next blog tomorrow.
Before I share with you the first big SECRET let me explain a situation that happened to me years ago more than once. Indeed numerous times.........
Party
I went to a party at a mates house in the summer. He had a great house with a large garden. The bbq was smoking and the drinks flowing.
After I’d been there a while I remember clearly seeing this girl across the room and my initial thought was “Wow she’s gorgeous!” She was about 5’6” with brunette hair down past her shoulders and long legs. She wore tight jeans that accentuated her slim figure and she had the most amazing smile. Amazingly I can remember it clearly as though it was yesterday. I also remember the feelings and emotions that I felt that instant. I remember wishing that I was taller, better looking, smarter, cooler, darker haired, with more chiselled features and so on.....
As the evening progressed I found her more and more attractive and felt myself wishing she was my girlfriend. How great I’d feel walking into a room with her. Taking her to a candlelit dinner. Walking hand in hand along a beach together as the sunset. The more I thought about this the more attractive she became and the more FEAR I felt. The FEAR continued to build to a point where the best thing to do was to not approach her and do nothing. At least that way the fear subsided.
Looks and fear
This scenario highlights two points: LOOKS and FEAR
FACT: Most men, indeed probably 95% of men go through their life thinking that women are attracted to men with GOOD LOOKS.
FACT: Most men FEAR approaching women.
Now let me share with you a SECRET.........Women are NOT ATTRACTED to men with great LOOKS!
“What?” I can hear you say..........Let me explain the difference....
The difference
Of course if a fantastic looking guy walks into the room women are going to stop and have a good view. They may chat to one another and say something like “Wow he’s hot!” or “Ooooo check him out. What a cutey!” But, and trust me this is an incredibly important ‘but’ women are far MORE attracted to PERSONALITY.
Now I can’t change your looks. A cosmetic surgeon may be able to, although I don’t think they’ve cracked how to make you taller! But, what I can do is change your personality so that you become an ACE with the ladies.
Now back to my mates party for a moment. Fast forward to the end of the evening and I spotted the girl again. She was cosying up to a guy. He was shorter than me, had a large stomach and very little hair. She was laughing the whole time at his jokes and from the body language you could see she was enjoying herself.
So, my friend, you have to understand that men are initially attracted to looks. For us guys it’s a very visual thing. If you don’t believe me then check out the top shelf of a magazine stand in a newsagent. Wall to wall porn!
It's not about the visuals
Why is there no equivalent for women? Because for women it’s not about the visuals.
There’s an old saying that women use: “Win my mind and you can have my body.”
It’s BANG on the money!!
If you win over the mind of a woman she’s yours forever. It doesn’t matter what you look like, how tall you are, what car you drive. But you have to WIN her mind.
In our course we explain how to do this.
How you can WIN her mind. How you can be the most AMAZING guy she’s ever met.
I’m going to share with you 2 MASSIVE SECRETS.
The first one I’m going to talk about today and the second one in the next blog tomorrow.
Before I share with you the first big SECRET let me explain a situation that happened to me years ago more than once. Indeed numerous times.........
Party
I went to a party at a mates house in the summer. He had a great house with a large garden. The bbq was smoking and the drinks flowing.
After I’d been there a while I remember clearly seeing this girl across the room and my initial thought was “Wow she’s gorgeous!” She was about 5’6” with brunette hair down past her shoulders and long legs. She wore tight jeans that accentuated her slim figure and she had the most amazing smile. Amazingly I can remember it clearly as though it was yesterday. I also remember the feelings and emotions that I felt that instant. I remember wishing that I was taller, better looking, smarter, cooler, darker haired, with more chiselled features and so on.....
As the evening progressed I found her more and more attractive and felt myself wishing she was my girlfriend. How great I’d feel walking into a room with her. Taking her to a candlelit dinner. Walking hand in hand along a beach together as the sunset. The more I thought about this the more attractive she became and the more FEAR I felt. The FEAR continued to build to a point where the best thing to do was to not approach her and do nothing. At least that way the fear subsided.
Looks and fear
This scenario highlights two points: LOOKS and FEAR
FACT: Most men, indeed probably 95% of men go through their life thinking that women are attracted to men with GOOD LOOKS.
FACT: Most men FEAR approaching women.
Now let me share with you a SECRET.........Women are NOT ATTRACTED to men with great LOOKS!
“What?” I can hear you say..........Let me explain the difference....
The difference
Of course if a fantastic looking guy walks into the room women are going to stop and have a good view. They may chat to one another and say something like “Wow he’s hot!” or “Ooooo check him out. What a cutey!” But, and trust me this is an incredibly important ‘but’ women are far MORE attracted to PERSONALITY.
Now I can’t change your looks. A cosmetic surgeon may be able to, although I don’t think they’ve cracked how to make you taller! But, what I can do is change your personality so that you become an ACE with the ladies.
Now back to my mates party for a moment. Fast forward to the end of the evening and I spotted the girl again. She was cosying up to a guy. He was shorter than me, had a large stomach and very little hair. She was laughing the whole time at his jokes and from the body language you could see she was enjoying herself.
So, my friend, you have to understand that men are initially attracted to looks. For us guys it’s a very visual thing. If you don’t believe me then check out the top shelf of a magazine stand in a newsagent. Wall to wall porn!
It's not about the visuals
Why is there no equivalent for women? Because for women it’s not about the visuals.
There’s an old saying that women use: “Win my mind and you can have my body.”
It’s BANG on the money!!
If you win over the mind of a woman she’s yours forever. It doesn’t matter what you look like, how tall you are, what car you drive. But you have to WIN her mind.
In our course we explain how to do this.
How you can WIN her mind. How you can be the most AMAZING guy she’s ever met.
The course
It’s all in our course THE SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION
In the next instalment I’m going to share with you the FEAR secret!
Although if you want to fast forward and get over your FEAR now then check out the course. We tell you how to do that in massive detail. It’s a big subject and our exercises are designed to make you lose the FEAR forever!
For now though, remember, women are not attracted to LOOKS, so get out there and have some fun.
Want to know the SECRETS on how to attract women? Sign up to the FREE coaching email, full of dating tips for men and get a FREE guide on Why Most Dates Fail.
Callum
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