"Charlie/Callum – PLEASE HELP!”
“I can’t find anything in common with this girl and I really like her. We’ve been on a couple of dates (followed your advise about the first 2 meetings), but can’t seem to find anything in common. Should I make something up?”
“I think I’ve made a good impression, but our interests just don’t match. I’m seeing her in a couple of days for a drink, immediate advice would be great.”
David – Middlesex
Hi David
Don’t panic, you’ve done the hard part – a girl you like has agreed to met you (and on multiple occasions). The big question you’re asking is “does a couple have to have interests/hobbies in common to go the distance?”
Answer – “NO”
Why? - Attraction has nothing to do with how much you have in common with another person.
It does make it easier to start conversations and meet people. For example if you’re both into Morris Dancing I’m guessing you’ll always attend the same functions and you have something that you are both passionate about and can discuss.
However, I’ve seen lots of relationships fall apart because they were built on a common interest because further down the road that is still the only commonality.
Everyone has heard the phrase “Opposites attract?”
It’s absolutely true.
The KEY thing to remember in the early stages of a relationship that it’s all about ATTRACTION.
Everything else is IRRELEVANT!
AND, if you aren’t ATTRACTIVE to the woman she’s not going to DATE you regardless of whether you have loads in common or not.
In our course we teach you HOW to CREATE that attraction.
We coach you in the SKILLS you need to be a MAGNET to women!
It’s all here: The SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™.
Why chase women – if you attract them, then they’ll come to you!
Good luck David
Callum
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Why guys always screw-up!
The scenario
I was chatting to a girl in the office a few days ago....
She does internet dating and was explaining to her friends how it all works.
The conversation got onto a ‘hot prospect’ that she was supposedly going to meet up with but how she’d decided to ‘bail out’ as she had some doubts and didn’t have the same feelings for the guy.
My eyes lit up as I grasped the relevance of this and how it would be useful to share with our email subscribers.....so here goes:
Apparently they’d been emailing for a while which had progressed to instant messaging on MSN and a few phone calls and text messages.
He was a music producer.
Wow! Cool job!
So I asked her why she wasn’t going to see him. Her answer went like this:
“I just don’t feel the same for him. Perhaps I’m too fussy. At first I really liked him and thought it would be great to meet as we seemed so alike. I was really optimistic.”
I asked her what changed....
“Well he just became a bit too ‘full on.’ He’d text me every morning with a “Hi gorgeous” message. And he’d text me all the time.”
She then went on to say:
“So I told him I didn’t want to meet up. I wanted to cool it for a while. He said he’d fallen for me, big time and really thought we had a future together.”
When a woman says she wants to ‘cool it for a while’ you’re history!!
History
And this guy is history. He didn’t even get a first date.
My friend thinks she’s too fussy.
Guess what?
The guy screwed up!
MASSIVELY!
Never, never, never reveal your true feelings for a woman at such an early stage.
It’s 100% guaranteed to KILL the attraction she feels for you.
There are numerous reasons and detail behind the why and I’m going to touch on 3:
Fact 1:
Too soon.
First off it’s too early.
You may see someone and engage in conversation and think to yourself “Wow this girl is amazing I think I could marry her!”
She may also be thinking something like “I like this guy, he’s fun, cute and sexy. I hope this goes somewhere.”
But the moment you come on so strong you’re killing the mystery, the intrigue, the differentiator and other thing that make you attractive. In fact you’ve become a lame, boring, dull and typical guy!
So chill out!
Take your time. Act aloof.
Fact 2:
In this case my friend has been living by herself for 3 years.
Living by yourself has some advantages. You can be a ‘free spirit’. You can choose what you want to do and when you want to do it. You can live like a slob or live in a ‘showhome!’ The point is the choice is yours.
The moment you come on strong, her subconscious is going to start ringing alarm bells, saying “Change! Change! Change!”
People don’t like change. So avoid this but not breaking the status quo.
Fact 3:
She got to miss you.
Guys that text every hour of the day, come across as needy, desperate and generally a proper wet rag!
I doubt you’re any of those, but that is how it appears.
Would a really hot guy who had the pick of numerous women really text every hour?
No, he’d be hard to get hold of, difficult to pin down and the women would be chasing him.
So don’t text every hour and never write ‘needy’ messages.
If you write “Hi gorgeous” then you owe me a case of beer!!
Instead write:
“Hey I know you’re missing me like crazy, so I wanted to give you a little taster of me! Have fun! X”
A text like that say’s you’re confident about yourself. You’re not needy. You’re not trying to change her life and move in with her. It also sub-consciously makes her feel you’re different, calm, confident and slightly aloof.
This is a tiny fraction of what we coach in The SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™.
If you want to perfect the ART of ATTRACTING women.
Want to know the SECRETS on how to attract women? Sign up to the FREE coaching email, full of dating tips for men and get a FREE guide on Why Most Dates Fail.
Good luck out there.
Callum
I was chatting to a girl in the office a few days ago....
She does internet dating and was explaining to her friends how it all works.
The conversation got onto a ‘hot prospect’ that she was supposedly going to meet up with but how she’d decided to ‘bail out’ as she had some doubts and didn’t have the same feelings for the guy.
My eyes lit up as I grasped the relevance of this and how it would be useful to share with our email subscribers.....so here goes:
Apparently they’d been emailing for a while which had progressed to instant messaging on MSN and a few phone calls and text messages.
He was a music producer.
Wow! Cool job!
So I asked her why she wasn’t going to see him. Her answer went like this:
“I just don’t feel the same for him. Perhaps I’m too fussy. At first I really liked him and thought it would be great to meet as we seemed so alike. I was really optimistic.”
I asked her what changed....
“Well he just became a bit too ‘full on.’ He’d text me every morning with a “Hi gorgeous” message. And he’d text me all the time.”
She then went on to say:
“So I told him I didn’t want to meet up. I wanted to cool it for a while. He said he’d fallen for me, big time and really thought we had a future together.”
When a woman says she wants to ‘cool it for a while’ you’re history!!
History
And this guy is history. He didn’t even get a first date.
My friend thinks she’s too fussy.
Guess what?
The guy screwed up!
MASSIVELY!
Never, never, never reveal your true feelings for a woman at such an early stage.
It’s 100% guaranteed to KILL the attraction she feels for you.
There are numerous reasons and detail behind the why and I’m going to touch on 3:
Fact 1:
Too soon.
First off it’s too early.
You may see someone and engage in conversation and think to yourself “Wow this girl is amazing I think I could marry her!”
She may also be thinking something like “I like this guy, he’s fun, cute and sexy. I hope this goes somewhere.”
But the moment you come on so strong you’re killing the mystery, the intrigue, the differentiator and other thing that make you attractive. In fact you’ve become a lame, boring, dull and typical guy!
So chill out!
Take your time. Act aloof.
Fact 2:
In this case my friend has been living by herself for 3 years.
Living by yourself has some advantages. You can be a ‘free spirit’. You can choose what you want to do and when you want to do it. You can live like a slob or live in a ‘showhome!’ The point is the choice is yours.
The moment you come on strong, her subconscious is going to start ringing alarm bells, saying “Change! Change! Change!”
People don’t like change. So avoid this but not breaking the status quo.
Fact 3:
She got to miss you.
Guys that text every hour of the day, come across as needy, desperate and generally a proper wet rag!
I doubt you’re any of those, but that is how it appears.
Would a really hot guy who had the pick of numerous women really text every hour?
No, he’d be hard to get hold of, difficult to pin down and the women would be chasing him.
So don’t text every hour and never write ‘needy’ messages.
If you write “Hi gorgeous” then you owe me a case of beer!!
Instead write:
“Hey I know you’re missing me like crazy, so I wanted to give you a little taster of me! Have fun! X”
A text like that say’s you’re confident about yourself. You’re not needy. You’re not trying to change her life and move in with her. It also sub-consciously makes her feel you’re different, calm, confident and slightly aloof.
This is a tiny fraction of what we coach in The SECRET ART OF ATTRACTION™.
If you want to perfect the ART of ATTRACTING women.
Want to know the SECRETS on how to attract women? Sign up to the FREE coaching email, full of dating tips for men and get a FREE guide on Why Most Dates Fail.
Good luck out there.
Callum
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